But there was no sharp pain this time
Just the ghost of your presence compressing my chest like a vine
An unshakable absence
Like most of my insides crawled out of my mouth and went west
But that’s fine
We cast our hearts in plaster
We imagined our bodies were fashioned of stone
But they chipped at the brick and mortar
We found out that we’re only layers of skin hiding bones
While I keep finding ways to push the good out for the bad
Oh, how selfish of myself
To always say that it was more than I could take
Like it was pain I couldn’t shake
Like it could break me with its fingers
Throw my body in the lake and I would slowly sink away
But the truth is it was sorrow that I made and wouldn’t face
See, I keep falling for the future after tripping on the past
And I am always tearing sutures out to make the anguish last
Like it defines me or reminds me
I’ve found comfort in my suffering
And uncertainty in happiness and death
Because what’s next is such a mystery to me
And I am terrified of all the things I feel but cannot see
Friends and family
Put your hand into my hand and lay your head into my chest
You are all that I have left here
We are all that we have left